Richard Ritenbaugh acknowledges that it is a tough time to be a parent, especially with leftist 'progressive' draconian child endangerment laws, threatening to confiscate offspring if parents dare to publicly discipline them. Recently, the University of Virginia's Institute on Advanced Culture identified four current parenting styles ,(1) the faithful, (20% of the population) sticking to religious principles, talking about religion, (2) the engaged progressives (21% of the population), focusing on teaching children responsibility and decision-making, but leaving religion out, relying on personal and subjective experience , (3) the detached-hands off, non-interfering, laisses-faire style, (19% of the population), and (4) the over-indulgent American Dreamer style (27% of the population), putting their children on a pedestal, super-inflating their egos. British Nanny Emma Jenner, explaining the failure in modern child-rearing practices, suggests that parents now (1) have a fear of their children, not wanting to upset them, (2) have lowered the expectation bar, making no demands on them, (3) have lost support from the public in terms of instilling respect for authority figures, (4) have relied on shortcuts such as television and video games instead of genuine interactive supervision, and (5) have become worn-out slaves of their children. To counteract these deleterious practices, parents must take three actions. (1) They must establish their authority—the earlier the better, realizing that the biblical line of command consists of God the Father, Jesus Christ, the husband, the wife, and the children as subjects, and not the other way around. (2) Parents must also be consistent and on the same page, refusing to be manipulated by crafty dividing tactics of their offspring. (3) Finally, parents must be involved with their offspring, staying at post all the time, supervising their maturation into God-fearing people.
Martin Collins illustrates the horrible degradation of this society because of the abandonment of the Fifth Commandment, insists that God intended children to be a heritage and a reward to those who obey His Law. American society is cursed because the family, its most important component, is dysfunctional. It is impossible to raise families without God. Gentile societies have historically demonstrated subhuman treatment to both women and children; Modern Israel apparently wants to follow suit by murdering 3,000 children per day, with 1.09 million unborn children annually. Last week, the largely reprobate American Congress voted to fund the guilty murderers on a grand scale, an act even natural law would regard as patently inhumane. Children have two duties to their parents: to obey them (in the Lord) and to honor them. The parent (ideally) is to serve as a representative of God to the child. Cursing parents in the Old Covenant was a capital offense. Honor goes far beyond obedience. The parent is expected to teach children in a restrained and balanced way, not embittering, provoking, irritating, harassing, and not breaking the spirit of the child. Parents must remember that customs change, that trust trumps control, and that children need encouragement. Sons must be prepared for leadership, being encouraged to offer suggestions in family meetings. Aubrey Andelin offers fathers positive suggestions as to conducting family meetings and communicating. (1) Stop all activities and give full attention to the children. (2) Listen carefully, even if not in agreement. (3) Be understanding and express sympathy for their ideas. (4) Tell them you will think about their suggestion. (5) Praise their ideas as useful and important contributions even if you are not able to agree with, or implement, them. As parents, our mandate is to bring children up in the understanding of the Lord's will, largely by our own positive example.
Though experts proclaimed the twentieth century the Century of the Child in 1899, from a biblical perspective our social advancements have made life worse for our children. Martin Collins shows how the Bible predicted this of the end-time generations. (Also includes the inset "America's Lost Children.")
The fifth commandment bridges the two sections of love toward God and love toward man. We begin learning righteous conduct at home, with our parents.
John Ritenbaugh reiterates that since a nation is, for the most part, a family grown large, respect for the fifth commandment constitutes the basis for all good government. The family provides the venue for someone to learn to be hospitable and to make sacrifices for one another, learning the rudiments of community relations. For the child, parents stand in the place of God in the family structure, as the child's creator, provider, and teacher. Successful parenting involves sacrifice and intense work. The quality of a child's relationship with his parent (as well as the quality of parenting) determines his relationship to the community as well as to God. Compliance to the fifth commandment brings about the built-in, promised blessing of a long quality life. Our obligation to honor and to take responsibility for the care for our parents (as well as those more elderly than we are) never ends.
John Ritenbaugh observes that the fifth commandment provides a bridge, connecting our relationships with God and the relationships with our fellow human beings. It is the pre-eminent commandment of the second set of commandments- serving as a twin center pillar with the Sabbath commandment. The honor and deferential respect accorded to Almighty God should transfer to our physical parents and ultimately to other authority figures in society. Because the family structure provides the basic building block or template for all government, including the Government of God, if the family is undermined, society and government is likewise undermined. Because parents stand in the place of God, parents (because they are the formulators of the child's character) must live a life worthy of reverence as well as taking a timely, active, " hands —on" approach to the child's education and upbringing. God demands that parents produce Godly seed.