Ted Bowling, focusing on Deuteronomy 21:10-14, a passage giving instructions for the treatment of female prisoners-of-war, contends that, far from being a blatant example of sexual exploitation (as some 'progressives' have characterized it), this passage demonstrates God's protection of the most vulnerable among us. In the event an Israelite soldier became infatuated with a female prisoner-of-war, God protected the woman from a "one-night fling" in an effort to prepare her for an honorable marriage. She was to shave her head, removing any temptation from the young man, and enabling the woman to mourn for her family for thirty days. During this time of transition, she is given lodging as a guest in her captor's home, given new clothes and initiated into the laws, customs and practices of her new people. At the culmination of this time, the soldier makes the calculated choice of marrying her or setting her free. This thirty-day transitional period severs her from her pagan past and prepares her to enter as a full partner in the marriage relationship. Like the female prisoner-of-war, God's called-out one represent the lowly, rescued from the bondage of sin, experiencing a transition period of sanctification, during which time he is cleansed from his sins, as he awaits a future marriage to the One who has conquered, redeemed, and sanctified him.
Martin Collins, referring to a recent study reported by Psychology Today, stating that cohabitation has led to increased divorce, marital violence, and lack of fidelity after marriage, points out that mass media has shamelessly used sex to promote materialism. Sex has been characterized as the cornerstone of mass persuasion. Consequently, faithful marriage is endangered as the flames of lust, encouraged by mass media, have caused individuals to sin against their own bodies. God invented marriage to typify the union between Christ and the church, designing male and female (not the 58 genders proposed by one major media network) to meld into one complementary union-a single organism. The world mocks marriage, ignoring the rules instituted by God Almighty which would guarantee its success, body-body, soul-soul, and spirit-spirit. God asks Christians to marry another Christian in order to avoid the pain, lack of compatibility, and heartache of being unequally yoked. Compartmentalization is not an option in a Godly Marriage. In the Ephesians 5:22 formula, wives subject themselves to their husbands as to Christ, but husbands are mandated to love their wives as Christ loved the church, being willing to sacrifice their lives for them. God will not answer the prayers of husbands who do not love their wives. As both husband and wife yield to Jesus Christ, their love can be perpetually rekindled.
Our culture appears to be in steep decline, a fact we can see in the undermining of marriage throughout society. Despite having served mankind well down through the millennia, the institution of marriage is crumbling under a three-pronged attack engineered by Satan the Devil. John Ritenbaugh teaches that marriage is vital to understanding God's purpose and learning to live in harmony with one another.
Martin Collins, averring one of the major things for which we can be thankful is the marriage covenant, examines some of the chilling, corrosive, and detrimental consequences to a society which spurns the God-given marriage covenant. Radical feminism has tried to empower one gender by disabling and marginalizing the other gender, creating a pathological, dysfunctional society in which women cannot find good men to love and cherish and men cannot find good women to love and cherish. The irresponsible social engineers who have launched the ill-fated sexual revolution have damaged the family structure, polarizing men and women rather than viewing them as inseparable partners (metaphorically like two halves of the moon) as God had intended. The pattern of Eve as a help-meet to Adam was instituted before Adam and Eve sinned and was consequently not abrogated by Christ's sacrifice as some Biblical feminists have asserted. Women, to be sure, were never created as servants to their spouses but as complementary companions, sharing physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual relationships which mirror Christ's love for the church by sacrificing His very life for her. God intended husbands and wives to be one in mind and spirit, not bifurcated as Solomon's spiritual relationships with his pagan wives. Marrying outside of the faith makes it difficult to establish this spiritual connection. Daniel Lapin has summarized the pitfalls of the egalitarian marriage arrangements as encouraged by 'liberated' women. In our decadent western culture, the mortal enemies of the marriage covenant consist of (1) the pleasure seeking new-hedonism (or the 'new' morality), (2) the widespread acceptance of adultery, (3) the ease of divorce and annulment, and (4) the legalization of abortion (the equivalent of apostate ancient Israel's sacrificing children to Molech. Marriage was created for us to understand the spiritual God-plane relationship between Christ and the Church.
Martin Collins suggests that many singles have found dating in the church difficult, consequently turning to the world for companionship, courting dangerous consequences. Marriage is not anything to jump into compulsively or impatiently. Before commitment to an engagement, time, cultivation, and restraint are necessary components of responsible dating. Three steps of dating include (1) keeping the relationship moving from acquaintance into friendship on a totally non-romantic basis, (2) working to discern in the other person his or her attitude toward God and His truth, and (3) only as it is clear that God is calling the other person can one consider turning the relationship into a romantic one. If singles rely upon God, He will provide the right mate at the right time. It is important that one does not become unequally yoked; difference in values will ultimately destroy the relationship. Singles need to cultivate godly faith and hope, seeing God's plan unfold in their personal lives, realizing that God will provide a mate at the right or proper time.
Martin Collins, reflecting on the pervasive influence of pornography on the Internet, television, music, and print media, suggests that young people engaging in premarital sex are acting like sheep to the slaughter, totally oblivious to the real facts of life. Dating should be preceded by wholesome group activities; God created us as social beings, placing a longing in each individual for a member of the opposite sex. The purpose of dating should not be considered merely a pre-marriage ritual designed to prepare one for marriage, but instead (1) to develop wholesome interactions with the opposite sex in contrast to the world's dating games, totally mired in the lures of temptation and emotion described by James 1:14-15; (2) to help individuals to see their own strengths and weaknesses, gradually understanding themselves; (3) to develop practice in serving others, and (4) to discover the person one will marry. The more similarities there are in a relationship, the less likelihood that conflicts will emerge. A key ingredient in the dating process is faith in God's purpose in each person's life. The relationship one has with God takes precedence over any relationship with any other human being.
Richard Ritenbaugh warns that dating outside the church is fraught with obstacles and potential dangers, yoking a believer with an unbeliever and exponentially complicating the spiritual overcoming and growth process, exposing one to perdition or providing a grievous cross to bear. It is impossible to have the best of both worlds (the world and God's way). As in the physical plane, yoking together unlike creatures destroys harmony and productivity. Two can't walk together unless they have the same beliefs and goals. Paradoxically, the scattered condition of the church, when properly evaluated, actually may improve prospects for an appropriate mate.
How are the young people in the greater church of God supposed to approach the dating situation today? This article addresses this issue and gives advice on dating, sex and enjoying your youth.
Jesus lists judgment as the first of the weightier matters in Matthew 23, verse. This article explains this term and shows why judgment is a major part of Christianity.
John Ritenbaugh reiterates that chapter 21 describes Jesus Christ's public announcement of His Messiah-ship, when the crowds would select Him to be the Paschal sacrificial Lamb of God. After overturning the money changer's tables and cursing the fig tree, Jesus relates a parable about a man (symbolizing God) who planted a vineyard (symbolizing Israel and Judah), turning it over to some husbandmen (symbolizing the religious leaders who were responsible for the education of the nation), who later proved to be unfaithful, beating the owners servants (symbolizing the prophets) and killing the owner's son (symbolizing Jesus Christ). The responsibility for tending the vineyard was removed from those wicked husbandmen (symbolizing the priests and Pharisees) and given to new servants who would tend it faithfully, bringing about quality fruit replacing physical Israel with the Israel of God- or the Church. If the Church fails in its responsibility, God will take it away again and give it to someone who will bring forth fruit. When God gives us a responsibility, He gives us all the tools we need to carry it out as well as the freedom to decide how best to do it. God wants to see how we do with what we have been given. As future kings, we must learn how to solve problems. We are going to be accountable for the outcome. Jesus Christ as the cornerstone of the Kingdom of God will either be a sanctuary or a stumbling block or grinding stone to those leaders, peoples, or nations He encounters. We cannot allow the cares of the world to run interference with our calling. Spiritual goals, including nurturing our spouses and families, have to come first. Prayer and Bible study must be regarded as our lifeblood in establishing a relationship with God. Walking by faith (rather than walking by sight) will help us establish the right priorities. Our betrothal to Christ at this time does not have a specific date for the actual marriage; we must be prepared at all times. [NB: This series of Bible Studies from 1981-82 is incomplete.]
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