The Yuletide season, though often called the giving season by mainstream Christians, functions instead as a taking season marked by self-focus, self-concern, and self-indulgence. Individuals measure their worth by the value of gifts received, the number of cards and invitations collected, and the attention their own generosity attracts, all while pursuing excessive indulgence of personal appetites and desires. This pattern aligns with biblical descriptions of self-indulgence, including the Greek terms denoting revelry in luxury that enfeebles the mind and body, carousing that breaks down body, soul, and spirit, and a love of pleasure divorced from righteousness. Such indulgence separates participants from God and community, whether through overt luxury or through extreme self-denial that becomes its own obsession. Biblical examples illustrate the cost. Satan lost power, beauty, and eternal life through unbridled self-indulgence. Samson forfeited strength, dignity, and life by satisfying forbidden desires. Solomon, despite unmatched blessings, found joy replaced by despair after declaring that he withheld nothing from his eyes or heart. The season promotes these same dynamics on a broad scale, with Satan orchestrating its lights, carols, trees, and treats to foster nonstop gratification wrapped in false notions of charity and love. Modern expressions, including drag-themed nativity events that celebrate queer joy and radical self-acceptance, reflect the effeminacy and enfeebling warned against in Scripture. Both conventional Christmas-keeping and its radical offshoots stem from the same self-indulgent roots and lead to growing misery. Suicide rates spike after Christmas as many fail to measure up to the displayed joy, confirming that unhappiness itself becomes a form of self-indulgence. The season therefore represents Satan's annual effort to steal the crown from God's people through exquisite yet deadly traps.