Many singles, both within and outside God's church, find dating to be a challenging and often frustrating endeavor, echoing the sentiment of it being too much trouble. For singles in God's church, the pull of the world is strong, especially with the abundance of other singles offering thrills that can turn into chills. Dating in the world often carries the expectation of sexual encounters, whereas within the church, the primary drive is a desire for companionship to alleviate loneliness, seeking someone attractive in looks and personality to share time and experiences with. However, turning to the world for companionship often means turning away from those who are truly like-minded. Even within the church, not all singles share the same mindset if they lack a strong relationship with God, which can manifest as a failure to overcome personal sin or as self-righteousness that repels others. The obstacles and penalties of dating outside the church are far graver, likened to a dangerous game where the risks are high and the chances of avoiding a harmful match are slim. Dating requires adherence to a proper order and wisdom, recognizing that God is a God of order, not confusion. This order extends to relationships within the church, where activities must be conducted decently and in order, including the timing of embracing or refraining from it in dating contexts. An irritating habit in dating can transform initial attractions into annoyances over time, highlighting the need for patience and careful consideration before marriage. Rushing into marriage without taking time—at least a year or more—to see beyond the façade and understand a person's true character can lead to surprises and regrets in the first year of married life. Time, cultivation, and restraint are essential in a dating relationship. If a partner pressures morally during dating, it indicates a lack of fear of God and respect for His standards, foretelling potential heartbreak in marriage. The dating process mirrors a gestation period, requiring time to develop properly, much like human reproduction takes nine months. Impatience and societal pressure for instant results must be resisted to avoid problems from moving too fast. Premarital pregnancies can artificially speed up this process, often leading to long-term resentment or doubt about the commitment, tainting even the wedding day and setting a poor example for others in the church. Singles often err by moving too quickly from acquaintance to romantic involvement without allowing time for discernment. Taking a couple of years to observe someone's true colors and reputation is crucial before considering marriage. Dating narcissism, the intoxicating rush of early attraction and compliments, can cloud judgment of a person's true character, making a period of non-romantic friendship vital for objective evaluation. Dating outside the church carries serious consequences, often justified by singles with arguments like a lack of suitable partners within the church or the fear of missing out due to age. Such reasoning leads to attempts to force God's will by dating in the world with hopes of conversion, a risky and often unsuccessful endeavor. The strain of an unequally yoked relationship can manifest in daily conflicts over practices and priorities, becoming a tool for satan to pressure compromise. The proper order for developing a relationship within the church involves discerning God's calling in a person, observing repentance and growth in His ways, before allowing a non-romantic friendship to evolve into dating. Time is essential to reveal true character and confirm decisions. Singles must avoid the despair and hopelessness that can arise from dating frustrations, instead cultivating true hope and patience, trusting that God will provide the right mate at the right time according to His will.

The subject of dating is one that directly affects anyone who is at least 16 years old and holds principles we can all learn from. During the dating process, it is easy to let your relationship with God slip, as emotions often lead singles to prioritize romantic relationships over their spiritual connection. This mistake can become a form of idolatry, a sin that weighs down the heart with the cares of this life, such as romance or immorality. Singles must remain vigilant, praying for strength to resist worldly ways and to maintain a close relationship with God, as no one is strong enough to do this alone. This world's dating game often leads to misery, with practices like trolling or cruising reflecting a pursuit of easy, loose connections that decent individuals should avoid. Such behaviors can result in severe consequences, including sexually transmitted diseases, which affect millions of young people annually and carry significant physical, psychological, and economic costs. The process of temptation in dating can lead to desire, sin, and ultimately death if not addressed at the initial stage of temptation. Proper dating, however, offers valuable opportunities. It allows singles to connect with others as persons, discovering names, personalities, and philosophies, thus breaking out of isolation and combating loneliness. It aids in personal development by revealing strengths and weaknesses through interactions, promoting self-analysis and growth. Dating also provides a chance to serve others, contributing to their lives through genuine care and empathetic listening, rather than avoiding their struggles. Additionally, it helps in discovering the kind of person one might marry, offering criteria for wise judgments through varied experiences and emphasizing the importance of similarity in values and life goals. Singles are encouraged to patiently wait for God to provide a suitable partner, maintaining faith and actively pursuing a relationship with Him through prayer, Bible study, and obedience. While loneliness can be challenging, marrying someone based on superficial traits rather than character can lead to greater despair. God is working intimately in the lives of reverent and obedient singles, preparing them and their future mates first for His Kingdom and then for happiness in marriage. Trusting in His timing and will, rather than rushing ahead, ensures peace and spiritual blessings over the hard knocks of self-directed choices.

I must state clearly that dating and marrying outside the church is not recommended, as it presents a massive stumbling block and can lead to significant trouble in the future. The principle of not being unequally yoked with unbelievers applies to personal and intimate ties, including dating and marriage, where the two ways of life are incompatible. Practically speaking, dating outside the church or having an unconverted mate makes it nearly impossible to fully accomplish God's purpose in us due to inherent conflicts and strains. Even in situations where the church is scattered and potential mates are few, this does not provide leeway to date or marry outside the faith. God's principles remain unchanged regardless of circumstances, and taking matters into one's own hands can lead to long-lasting negative consequences. It is far better to wait with patience and faith, trusting that God will provide what is good for us in His time, including a suitable mate. If someone outside the church seems like a potential partner, one must not compromise on God's way of life. Every aspect of the relationship must be above board, and the individual should be introduced to the beliefs of the church through literature and discussion. If there is receptivity, no further steps should be taken until the person begins counseling for baptism and progresses in conversion. Marriage should only occur after baptism to ensure true conversion, as premature commitment can result in being bound to an unconverted mate and facing subsequent problems. Such situations are rare, and extreme caution is advised, as dating outside the church is generally unwise. The ideal is to marry someone comparable, sharing similar experiences, interests, tastes, and most importantly, beliefs. Marriages with the most in common tend to be the strongest long-term, while attraction to opposites often leads to separation over time due to differing paths. Trusting in God to provide a fitting mate, even amidst a scattered church, is essential, as He is capable of accomplishing the impossible for those who wait patiently on Him.