Family feuds, marked by retaliation, have caused immense suffering throughout history, claiming countless lives as nations and clans, akin to extended families, clash over power and riches. The Hatfield and McCoy feud, ignited by the theft of a hog in 1863, escalated through retaliatory killings, culminating in the New Year's Massacre of 1888, where Hatfields attacked McCoys, resulting in deaths and severe injuries. This cycle of vengeance persisted for nearly thirty years until legal intervention finally quelled it. Similarly, in Scotland, clans like Campbell and McDonald engaged in brutal retaliation over cattle rustling, leading to the Glencoe Massacre of 1692, where hospitality was betrayed with slaughter. In England, feuds between families such as the Bonneville's and Courtney's, and the York's and Lancaster's during the War of the Roses, saw relentless tit-for-tat violence, often merging into larger conflicts, with death tolls ranging from 35,000 to 100,000. These historical examples illustrate how retaliation, driven by human nature, transforms initial offenses into unending cycles of destruction and death. Jesus Christ addresses this destructive pattern of retaliation in His teachings, urging His disciples to reject the principle of "an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth," which, while intended as a measure of proportionate justice in ancient laws, often devolved into personal vengeance and feuds among families and clans. He instructs not to resist an evil person, advocating instead for responses that defy human instincts of retribution, such as turning the other cheek when struck, giving more than what is demanded, and going beyond what is required in service. His guidance focuses on personal matters, emphasizing attitudes of patience, humility, and sacrificial love to prevent escalation of conflict. Jesus sets a high standard, aiming to transform His followers' approach from dominance and retaliation to submission and peacemaking, reflecting His own character. He encourages bearing personal loss to overcome evil and maintain peace, presenting this as the ideal for His disciples to strive toward, even if it seems nearly impossible to achieve.

In the spirit of a foot washing attitude, we are called to handle offenses and insults with humility and non-retaliation, contrary to the natural impulses of human nature. Jesus Christ, during the Sermon on the Mount, provided clear guidance in Matthew 5:38-41, stating, "You have heard that it was said, 'An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.' But I tell you not to resist an evil person. But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. If anyone wants to sue you and take away your tunic, let him have your cloak also. And whoever compels you to go one mile, go with him two." These teachings emphasize turning the other cheek and going the extra mile, urging us to set aside pride and choose service over retaliation when faced with personal insults or wrongs. Christ's instruction to turn the other cheek addresses not physical harm but the humiliation of a backhanded slap, a cultural insult meant to degrade. By turning the other cheek, we accept further insult without retaliation, demonstrating humility and trust in God's justice rather than personal vindication. Similarly, in legal or material disputes, as in giving up both tunic and cloak, Christ challenges us to prioritize peace over possessions, avoiding escalation through countersuits or hostility. Going the extra mile, rooted in the context of Roman impressment, calls us to exceed forced obligations with a willing spirit, showing grace even under unfair treatment. This principle of non-retaliation is exemplified in David's encounter with Shimei in II Samuel 16:5-13, where David endured cursing and stone-throwing without striking back, relying on God's sovereignty rather than defending his honor. Scriptures such as Romans 12:17-18 further reinforce this, instructing us to repay no evil for evil and to live peaceably with all men as much as possible. Proverbs 15:1 reminds us that a soft answer turns away wrath, while I Peter 3:9 echoes Christ's call to bless rather than retaliate, aligning with the essence of turning the other cheek. Choosing not to retaliate goes against our instinct to defend ourselves when wronged, yet it reflects godly character. By responding with kindness and patience, we embody the servant-leadership of Jesus Christ, trusting in God's justice over personal retribution. This approach strengthens our relationships and mirrors the character of our Heavenly Father, as we strive to handle adversities with love and grace.

In the narrative of Judges, Samson's encounters with the Philistines reveal a cycle of retaliation that shapes much of his story. After his father-in-law denied him access to his wife and gave her to another, Samson declared, "This time I shall be blameless regarding the Philistines when I harm them," feeling justified in his intent to seek revenge for the personal affront. His response was destructive; he captured three hundred jackals, tied torches to their tails, and released them into the Philistine fields, burning their grain, vineyards, and olive groves, thus devastating their economy in a single night. The Philistines, in turn, retaliated by burning Samson's wife and her father, holding them responsible for inciting his actions. This act further fueled Samson's anger, as he vowed, "Since you would do a thing like this, I will surely take revenge on you, and after that I will cease." He then attacked the Philistines with brutal force, described as striking them "hip and thigh with a great slaughter," before retreating to a defensive position in the cleft of the rock of Etam. The cycle of vengeance continued as the Philistines mobilized a military force into Judah to capture Samson, intending to do to him as he had done to them. The men of Judah, fearing conflict, confronted Samson with three thousand men, pleading, "Do you not know that the Philistines rule over us? What is this you have done to us?" Samson replied, "As they did to me, so I have done to them," showing his view of the conflict as a personal tit-for-tat struggle. Bound by the men of Judah and delivered to the Philistines, Samson broke free when the Spirit of the Lord came upon him, using a fresh jawbone of a donkey to slay a thousand men in a bloody confrontation at Lehi. This relentless pattern of retaliation underscores Samson's personal vendettas, revealing his focus on individual honor and retribution rather than a broader vision for his people's deliverance.

In His Sermon on the Mount, Jesus Christ addresses the concept of retaliation, often referred to as Lex Talionis, or an eye for an eye, challenging the rigid interpretations of the Old Testament guideline. He clarifies that this law was not meant for literal retribution but as a principle of just compensation for damage, countering the vengeful attitudes of His time where mercy was rarely shown. Jesus teaches His disciples not to act with revenge, instructing them in Matthew 5:39, not to resist an evil person, but if slapped on the right cheek, to turn the other also, emphasizing a response of pacifism over retaliation in non-life-threatening situations. He further advises in Matthew 5:40 that if someone sues for a tunic, to let them have the cloak as well, suggesting a willingness to suffer loss rather than escalate conflict through countersuing. In Matthew 5:41, Jesus instructs that if compelled to go one mile, to go two, encouraging a cheerful attitude even when forced into service, as a way to defuse hostility. His teachings aim to elevate His followers above mere legalistic righteousness to a higher standard of patience and love, reflecting the true spirit of God's law by avoiding belligerence and vengeance in trying circumstances.

When offended, a human's natural tendency is to strike back, feeling justified in retaliating in kind with an eye-for-an-eye mentality. However, God never granted individuals the right to personal vengeance. He intended the eye-for-an-eye principle for judicial judgments through courts of law, not for personal retaliation. Jesus' life exemplifies adherence to the standards He requires of us, demonstrating restraint even as God in the flesh. His teachings emphasize acting in goodwill toward those we dislike, as well as those we favor, showing an unconquerable goodwill and invincible benevolence. This love, which involves both feeling and will, motivates us to do good rather than react negatively to offenses. Christ lists three ways people express ill-feelings—cursing, hatred, and spiteful persecution—and counters them with three responses for Christians: blessing with good words, doing good instead of retaliating, and praying for enemies' welfare. God desires us to reflect His image through such love, as He continually provides for all despite our actions. This battle against retaliation is fought on a spiritual level, in the mind, against attitudes that form the foundation of literal murder.

The world does not teach such principles today. Satan's world is not one of forgiveness, longsuffering, or patience but of retaliation and revenge. Today's motto is: Don't get mad, get even; Even the score; Hit back; and Give back as good as you get. So many of today's movies, television shows, and popular songs are based on revenge. Showing restraint is seen as a weakness. Sometimes we do not realize how competitive our human nature is. It is full of pride. It feels it has to win, to be vindicated, and if possible, elevated over others. Man's pride tends to drive him to extremes. And yes, this propensity is not easy to overcome. It is difficult to withstand unlawful and unwarranted criticism, but we must be able to forgive and forget, which our human nature fights against with all its power. In God's Word, we are instructed in how we are to deal with those who sin against us. To begin, we must remember, as Solomon reminds us in Ecclesiastes 7:22, that we have been guilty of the same sins in what we have said to others. Therefore, we must be willing to wipe the slate clean every day, not allowing feelings of hurt and revenge to eat at us like a poison. As part of the model prayer in Matthew 6:12, Jesus tells us, And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. Our sins are debts to God, which we, the debtors, cannot pay. God is willing to wipe our slates clean if we humble ourselves before Him. We ask for forgiveness for our sins, and by so doing, we acknowledge that there is no other way to get rid of sin but through the sacrifice of Jesus Christ. When we forgive others, God can see His own image reflected in us. As His children, we must be willing to forgive no matter the affront. Jesus gives us the example to follow, as He was able to ask the Father to forgive those who were crucifying Him (Luke 23:34)! Solomon gives us more advice in these verses in Ecclesiastes 7. We need to be balanced in our response, not over-reacting or taking what is said too seriously. We must be thick-skinned and not wear our feelings on our sleeves. We should not believe everything people say about us, and we should be careful when inquiring of others what people are saying about us. Yes, we may sometimes hear others say bad things about us, maybe words spoken in anger and intended to deliberately hurt us. But we have also said things that were unkind about others. Perhaps there was a time when a friend said something to us he did not mean and had no idea was insulting. Maybe what he said was true but his tone was offensive. These things happen in human relations. We need to learn to take them in stride. We must also consider the words spoken to us in spiritual correction, when we receive godly rebuke and instruction. In these situations, no specific sin is necessarily involved. Solomon teaches in Ecclesiastes 7:5, It is better to hear the rebuke of the wise than for a man to hear the song of fools. Some hurtful words are for our ultimate good. We must learn to take everything in our lives with much patience and longsuffering. What do we achieve by being patient with each other? What is the result of forgiving and showing proper restraint toward those who curse us? Peace. Paul writes in Hebrews 12:14-15: Pursue peace with all men, and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord: looking diligently lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled. God has called us to peace (I Corinthians 7:15). God's peace is a deep, spiritual calm that is unaffected by the world. It comes through our relationship with Jesus Christ and by taking on the character He displayed when He walked the earth. He did not react to the curses and false accusations of others (I Peter 2:23). We can have this kind of peace by striving to reproduce His character and by being obedient to His Word.

The command to love others requires a settled mind not to retaliate when wronged. One must meditate beforehand to behave as God does rather than respond in kind with a get even attitude. Revenge must not be sought because vengeance belongs to God alone. No action should be taken to inflict pain or injury on those who offend. The situation must remain in God's hands rather than in human efforts to administer justice. Evil must not be overcome by returning evil but by returning good instead. Jesus Christ set the example by showing love even to those who opposed Him and by refusing to seek revenge at the time of His death. He asked the Father to remit the penalty of their actions and to pardon and forgive them. David likewise refrained from acting on his desire for vengeance and left the decision with God.

Our Savior's remedy for combating crime shifts matters from retaliation by civil authorities to stopping it at its source. When each person is responsible for dealing with anger and hatred internally, keeping them from ever manifesting themselves as external acts, it also eliminates the fear of being caught by police and punished by the courts. The central thought Jesus expresses is that such thoughts are tantamount to murder in God's eyes. If a person never had an evil thought, no murder would exist. At first, Matthew 5:38-39 appears to say that one should simply offer himself as a sacrificial lamb: You have heard that it was said, 'An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.' But I tell you not to resist an evil person. But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. However, Jesus does not rule out self-defense in a life-threatening situation, as His illustrations in the wider context of Matthew 5 show. Taken together, His illustrations reveal that He is not considering anything more than rather minor, but irritating and perhaps considerably inconvenient, interruptions in our daily routines. The general thought is that we must not set ourselves up as the angry enemy of the person perpetrating evil against us. He advises us to remove the bitterness in our own hearts by doing good rather than retaliating and doing evil. It is a warning against letting our thoughts build a hatred-based case against others. This involves a great deal of humility and patience on our part, but it often diffuses what could build to murderous thoughts in our mind. We have all probably felt like not working at one time or another, but because we had to do it, we set our will, threw ourselves into accomplishing the work, and before we knew it, we were likely enjoying the accomplishment. This is a simple illustration, but the same general process is involved in Jesus' counsel. Jesus followed His own teaching, as Luke 23:34 illustrates: Then Jesus said, 'Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.' Then they divided His garments and cast lots. Earlier He had said, Or do you think that I cannot now pray to My Father, and He will provide Me with more than twelve legions of angels? Yet, retaliation was not on His mind. Fulfilling His work from His Father and in behalf of mankind overrode His personal feelings, even in this severe dilemma. Paul's thoughts regarding this issue are explicit in Romans 12:17-20. Paul's counsel to the congregation in Rome is clearly in line with what Jesus taught. He insists that we must never allow vindictiveness, the desire to get even with someone for a suffered wrong, to drive us. In the same vein, Peter taught that we must not repay evil with evil, insult with insult, but we must bless. We are called to react this way because if we want to be in God's Kingdom, it can only happen without the spirit of murder dwelling in us, and those evil retaliations are the spirit of murder. We are not to take vengeance because God has retained that responsibility to Himself. Only He fully knows and understands every facet of the circumstances and can judge perfectly. Paul addresses the issue of retaliation four times in Romans 12, which begins by stating that we are to be living sacrifices and not to conform to this world's ways. The picture should be clear. Somebody must be willing to do this if there will be peace. Jesus set the example: He, refusing to strike back, died for the entire world. Christ's non-retaliatory remedy is ultimately for everybody's benefit, but until He returns, the standards He set can be met and lived only by those who, like Jesus, have the Spirit of God, are living by faith, and are enabled to keep God's ways by God Himself. In regard to war and its vast and vicious killing, these very high standards have created quite a disagreement among many in the theological world. Christian nations feel they should involve themselves only in just wars. However, determining what constitut

Irritation develops into resentful anger which leads to retaliation. This progression from irritation to resentment and bitter anger leads to retaliation and can divide blood brothers. Pride counts all offenses real or imagined and puts them into a mental account book to justify its position until it finds an opportune moment to break out in vindication of itself. Love does not insist on its own way and will not even become provoked in the first place. Love makes no accounting of the evil done against it.

The first impulse in cases of insult or offense is usually to retaliate or to get even in some way to gain a measure of satisfaction. This response is natural but not spiritual. God instructs submission in such cases because He is teaching a Christian to think of duties and responsibilities toward Him rather than privileges. Even when a person has done wrong in abusing another, there is no right to retaliate. Submission must occur cheerfully as an act of faith. When a person is retaliating the mind is never pure because revenge, anger, and vindictiveness are present. Revenge is not sweet but a poison that breeds war. If the person who is injured or abused does not lower the standard to that of the abuser then God remains free to work and the oppressor might even be changed to the high standard of the oppressed.